Everybody's doin it

I just got home from a get-together at Tully's. She has a second job at her apt complex working in the 'club house'. Perk: Keys to the joint.

We had some beers, ate some grilled meat and accessories, and decided to take a swim. Of course I didn't bring a suit. And of course no one has an extra. And, OF COURSE, I am wearing my in-great-need-of-laundry-done thong underwear.

Don't worry- it was just me and 3 girls.

And my thong was old news once Tully started the nude races.

Did I participate??? I did not. The thong was traumatic enough. But I DID watch.

You're it

I had a flashback tonight to something I have not thought about for YEARS. I grew up in the 80s. In the Midwest. So maybe this will only be familiar to those in this demographic. But remember when you were playing with a bunch of your pals-- 'Tag' or 'Hide and Seek'? How did you pick who was 'it'??

We stood in a circle and put one foot in the center of the circle. One person eliminated people one by one while tapping on their feet-- saying this:

Eeiney Meany Miney Mo,
Catch a tiger by its toe,
If he hollers make him pay,
Fifty dollars everyday.
My mother told me
to pick the very best one
and YOU-ARE-NOT-IT.
(You dirty dish rag- you.)

Yeah, we added on that last part at some point... Mixin it up.

When it rains it pours

Fortunately, it's been pouring the good stuff. It seems that good things have been happening to all sorts of people in my life.

My mom finished her degree in Biotechnology last year. She has been a manager at a grocery store for the past 5-6 years and was having a hard time finding a job using her degree. Yesterday she got word that she passed the security audit for a job at the USDA labs in Ames! Isn't it nice when something good happens to someone who deserves it?

On that note, Jesse passed his last exam on Monday. He has been studying- literally- for the last 88 days. I CAN'T believe the studying is over! He starts work at American Express on June 9.

My older sister, Jessica, is closing on a house on June 1.

My younger sister, Chanelle, graduated from HS last Sunday.

And *I* should be receiving a (much earned) raise in the near future. And a promotion.

Just KNOWING me seems to hold some magic- no?

I see how it is...

All ya gotta do to get a little action on your site is post a mostly naked girl.

There ya go Gary. Some more traffic for ya.

25 of 'em

Stolen from Gary who stole it from Joelle. From Julie. Yanno.

Here are the states I have visited:



make your own

My goal is to visit at least one state for every year I'm alive- I'm up by one for now!

Weekend recap

I had no sooner promised to be back to the blog- and I take off again. Here is a short recap of the weekend:

Friday night- Zoned out. Watched TV, ate food, de-stressed from a Friday full of fires at work.

Saturday- State track meet to watch lil sis run. Burned as hell- lobster woman you might say. Do I not learn? Why do I still not own sun block? Shopping heals all- bought some new jeans. Watched Cold Mountain. Depressing I think.

Sunday- Skipped church. Dress up and go to lil sis's graduation from high school. Sweat like hell in gym. Freeze like hell at outside party. See bunches of people. Occasional awkward silences. Eat food. Lotsa cake. Yum.

There it is. I hope everyone had great weekends!

Call off the bloodhounds

No-- I have not left the country. I have also not died, gone into a coma or been committed.

I have been busy. Super busy. Too busy to blog you say?

Here's the thing-- I think that most people blog at work, with an occasional entry from home... (I wonder if some bloggers EVER work. But that's another subject.) Here's a sample of what my work has been like for the past 72 hours:

Big Guy at Company: Jazlyn, I would like you to ignore everything I've ever said about this project we've been working on for 10 months and read my mind about how I'd really like it-- by 1:00.

Me: So, same drill as yesterday?

BGaC: Exaaaactly...

I have been frazzled, hassled and just a bitch to be around. It may be the work of 3 people I am doing- just a guess. It's been at the point where I come home and just say-- Bleh. So I have not blogged recently. I think I'm back.

Mornings

Today was, again, one of those mornings where I could not get up. I was laying in my bed, the alarm was going off, and my boyfriend showed no sign of moving. For the next hour. My bed was more comfortable than it has ever been- again- and I finally forced myself out with a grumbled, "fuck...".

The annoying thing about waking up-- once I'm up- I am fine! No signs of dragging ass seen 30 seconds earlier. And I KNOW this. As I lay in bed and resist crying out to the sleep gods, I know that once I become vertical, I will be the fully functional human that I am right now... Once I get out of bed I feel awake and motivated and ready to wrestle my closet for the perfect outfit and with my hair for anything presentable.

I read O magazine. Yes- Oprah. I am currently 3 months behind. Make that 2 months-- I finished one up tonight. The April edition was all about TIME- saving, making, wasting, etc. From that edition, here is a list of 12 ways to get out the door faster:

The night before:
1- Prepack briefcase/purse.
2- Keep cell phone in charger on briefcase/purse.
3- Prepack lunches/backpacks as needed.
4- Prearrange clothes.
5- Review tomorrow's schedule.
6- Prepare coffee machine.
7- Coordinate bathroom schedules.
8- Have several routine breakfasts handy- portable if possible.
9- Keep make-up case organized.
10- Set a timer if you linger in the shower.
11- Get a low maintenance haircut.
12- Morning: not a time to be industrious. No paying bills, doing dishes, starting projects etc.

I think I need to implement #4 and #10... I tend to take long showers... The other suggestions are good- just not the most applicable to my little life.

Must...turn..... off...... T...V.....

E! True Hollywood Story is like a drug.

Addictive, full of promises and ultimately no good.

Not Polly

Last night I got together with Tully. She is one of my oldest best friends. We were friends back when we couldn't decide if we were going to marry Joey McIntyre or Jordan Knight. We would go on endless walks night after night in our microscopic town during junior high because there was nothing else to do. We would talk on the phone almost nightly after spending all day at school together. I read her quizzes out of 'YM' magazine and we passed notes to each other in the hall until graduation. We rose hell in high school- but not enough to ever get caught or in trouble. We have ALWAYS been friends.

Obviously, Tully is one of my favorite people. She has consistently read Ya Wanna, and has decided to start her own blog-goodness. Introducing... a near future must read...

Not Polly

Since we were kids, people have mispronounced her name. Usually as 'Tellie'. Or Kelly, Holly or Polly. Hence the name. Go, Tul.

Hooray for the little one!

The current baby in our family is my little sister Chanelle. She is 18 and I can barely see her as 16. She is like a cute little button. Anyway, I just got back from what could have been the last track meet of her life- but it wasn't...

She was on a relay team that qualified for State! I am SO proud of her.

Jesse and I were both there. When we weren't watching the kid run, we were reminiscing about our old track days- and how slow we are now.

UPDATE: Found out Saturday that she made State in *2* events! 4x1 and the sprint medley! Yay kid!

*sigh* Can I go yet?

Tonight I am going over to my friend Tully's in an attempt to help her start a blog. I am excited about it because she is way smart and funny. And she was an English major: in college so "she" will have, impeccable punctuation?? Stay tuned. I will surely let you know how it goes.

Meanwhile, I am at work, hiding in my programmer's office, working on the project from hell. It is almost 4pm and the clock is moving backwards.

And why is Blogrolling no worky? Oh- finally... there it is...

Hallelujah

Goooooooooooooo Jesse!

He just passed his Series 66 this morning. I'm sure it was the protein he ate last night.

Way to go, babe.

Call me Nurse Jazzy

Jesse went to bed early tonight. He'd been sleeping for about 30 mins when he needed me to look at his shoulder...

Whaa?

Apparently, it is possible to cut your shoulder, while you're sleeping, with your PILLOW. Zippers should not be part of a pillow.

I rushed to the scene with Hydrogen Peroxide, Neosporin and Band-aids. Overkill? Most definitely.

Now it's time fooooooooor....

Interesting stuff about me.

Topic: My Dad's four wives.

Is he Mormon? No. He's Methodist, so he's only allowed to marry them one at a time. Here's the rundown:

Wife #1: Some lady named Ruth Ann that I didn't know existed until I was 15. My aunt is still in cahoots with her.

Wife #2: My momma. She dropped out of college to marry him. Hm. Not so smart. But here I am, so I'll shut up.

Wife #3: Mary. Mary is 18 years younger than my dad. She was one of his students. My mom taught her to put on make-up and she was our babysitter. This has definitely been used 42 times in a made-for-TV-movie.

Wife #4: Connie. Connnnnnie. This one- this one I call my "StepMonster". I think her mission in life is to be mean. That's it. Just be mean. So I like to torment her with my unyielding kindness. The only sure defense.

That's it. There's only four. Come back later and it may have changed.

And so ends the first installment of "Interesting stuff about me".

Charlie

Did anyone ever read 'A Wrinkle in Time' by Madeleine L'Engle?

It was only my favorite book in fifth grade.

Tonight I missed seeing Meg and little Charles Wallace on the small screen. I'm sure it was massacred, and would have just ruined my perception of this book I have read over and over and over...

Sidenote: Why did they call him Charles Wallace? How bout 'Charles' or 'Charlie' or maybe 'Charles in Charge'? He was pretty much in charge.

More protein?

I had my very first 'Mother-in-law' moment yesterday. No I'm not married to anyone, but I do sleep with this lady's son. He moved all of his clothes and holey-underwear-that-I-don't-like-to-touch in this weekend... I take that as basically living together.

Anyway.

Jesse has had some tests to take recently for his job. He has also had a little trouble passing a couple of them.

So his mother approaches me yesterday (we have a VERY good relationship- she's great) and says, 'Ya know, Jazlyn, I think Jess hasn't been doing very well recently because he hasn't been getting enough to eat...'

Um.

He's almost 25. He can feed himself, right?

Momma gifts

Jesse and I just went on a voyage for the perfect Mother's Day gifts.

His mom: a life memories journal so that we can always remember stories about her life.

My mom: a book titled: 'Codependent No More'.

Maybe I should order a side of flowers with that one?

Brush with tragedy

I usually watch Survivor on Thursdays at 7.

So- I recorded the "unforgettable all-new series-finale" Friends.

I watch Survivor, record Friends.

I decided to flip over to the last 15 minutes of the finale to ruin my delayed viewing of the show.

GOOD THING I DID.

My tape ran out RIGHT when Rachel decided between boarding the plane and not.

My final thoughts.... eh....

It was what I expected. Although, did anyone else feel like they were cramming in closure, closure, closure....? Mike to Phoebe-- 'I think we should have one of those...' Is that necessary?

Scaredy pants

Piggy-backing on one of mikey's topics today:

Spiders scare the hell out of me.

Search for 'arachnephobia' on Google- you'll find this. But there should be a big picture of me.

I was pretty new at my current job when one of my coworkers approached my desk. He was smiling, cupping something in his hands, and said, 'I heard you liked these!' Me, being very trusting, thought- 'YAY! I bet it's candy!' So I leeeaaned in to see what he had. (you know what's coming- I-- didn't.)

As he opened his hands onto my desk, a small lanky spider came shooting out in a fury. It was freaking out on my desk.

IMAGINE me. Expecting candy. Getting freaking-out spider.

I didn't have a mirror handy to see my face, but it caused my ass-clown coworker to lunge at the spider, smash it, and write me three emails that day, apologizing.

Me too

I just spotted something over at this site, that I would like to highlight:

http://johnkerryisadouchebagbutimvotingforhimanyway.com/

Whaaa?? That's super good. I don't know who Alan Blevins is, but everyone has an opinion, and his is rather amusing.

not yours

I am currently eating the LAST of the Thin Mints. Yep. Girl Scout cookies. There are about 7 left- and they're all mine.

MiIIIIIINNNEEEE!!!!! MMWWAA haa haaa!!!!

Is Monday over yet?

There's this lady at work? She doesn't like me. At all. Today I walk up to her desk to ask her a question. She glares at me from about 20 ft out- and I don't know what to do! So I smile at her. I think now-- maybe this smile annoyed her more? Anyway, I don't think I have ever done anything specifically to make her not like me. She IS pretty grumpy most of the time. And I AM quite girly/bubbly. I'm not sorry- that's me. Any advise?

In other news...

Mr Tree has a test tomorrow. A big fat 'Life, Accident and Health Insurance' test. We have spent many hours tonight cramming in all the final facts for the grand exam. If he passes the test tomorrow he has ONE MORE to take before he is an official financial advisor.

Wish him luck here if you'd like!

Pals- the old kind

Is there anything better than old friends? New friends are great- but there's something about a person that you've known for years, had a cazillion experiences with, and you know they could get you in real trouble with all of the stuff they have on you. They've known you with bad haircuts, bad boyfriends and bad breath. They've shared with you deep secrets, shallow gossip and large pizzas at 3am. Situations may have caused you to slip up- not talk for weeks- months even. But then you talk! And nothing has changed.

Is this sounding like a Hallmark card?

Yes- yes it is. Here's my inspiration:

I recently got off the phone with my best friend from Australia- Rachel. What a charge to talk with someone I have shared so much time- so many experiences with. I hiked through New Zealand with this girl! We were 'Scuba Jaz' and 'Scuba Rach' together! I call her 'Bianca' for no apparent reason and she lets me! We were even tattooed together.

I have known Rachel for (only) 2.3 years. I can't wait to make her one of my older old pals.

Hap-py May Day

When I was little, we would make May baskets. We would fill plastic cups with popcorn and candy, cover it with plastic wrap, and attach little handles made from colored pipe cleaners. Then we would go to our neighbors houses, leave them on the doorstep, ring the doorbell and RUN like hell. Rumor was, if we were caught- we would be kissed.

Where did this tradition COME from? What does it have to do with anything???

Did anyone else do this?